tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694675.post874370213363544909..comments2023-10-31T08:28:28.129-07:00Comments on All That Arises Ceases: More doggerelErikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14043860015232125483noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694675.post-49957409601945626062009-01-07T20:37:00.000-08:002009-01-07T20:37:00.000-08:00Wow, Erik, this is very tight. Cool piece of doggo...Wow, Erik, this is very tight. Cool piece of doggone doggerel! There’s hardly a single dangling beat or wasted syllable. I like the rhyme in the first stanza the best. It sets a fun, Suess-like tone for the piece. I think it does slow down a little in the last line of the 2nd stanza, “Of course….” Those two words are passive. You might try “You know you know who.” Too cute? Maybe “I think you Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03193183461682299611noreply@blogger.com